Thursday, October 20, 2016

THE BULLY ( reloaded )- CAPT AJIT VADAKAYIL the link doesnt work




A couple of years ago, after I came home on vacation, I had gone for a function with my wife. There I met my younger son’s classmate’s father.  

During the course of our polite conversation he asked me I f I knew that my son is getting bullied in school.

I said “  He is the tallest and heaviest guy in his class- how can anybody  dare to bully him.

He replied “ Your wife will know the bully, he is the class leader and 4 years older than the rest of the class “

On the drive back home I asked my wife , whether she knew anything about it.

She said he has never come home with torn clothes. I asked her about missing pens , not wanting to go to school , or some signs like that.

She said  “ Yes, he does NOT like to go to school.  Sometimes he comes back with his compass box or pen missing .  I have already bought three new ones in the last 3 months.  Certain days he comes back home without eating his lunch packed in the tiffin box. He appears disturbed while studying at home . But the class leader is the boy who gives me notes , whenever Aashik has missed school. Poor chap, his parents are in Dubai and he is all alone , staying with some far off relatives “.

At home , I confronted my son . He came out with the truth, after some arm twisting .

My son was the butt of all the  practical jokes of the bully --  he would throw things at him in class. – he would be teasing him in front of the whole class and girls constantly—

I told my wife “ Tomorrow , though it is a holiday for younger kids --first thing in the morning we will be going to the school and I will speak to the Principal and class teacher “

At school I told the Principal   “ I want to speak to you in front of my son’s teachers.  It is about my son getting bullied in your school.   If I don’t see a good receptive attitude from you, I will put unbearable heat on the school “

Pretty soon we had 3 teachers in the Principals room.

I asked them if they knew my son was getting bullied.

All the 3 of them said  “ Yes!. We though you knew. Your son get bullied by children half his size , just because he does NOT retaliate, so they get encouraged “

I told them “ I have hung a sand bag in my house since he was 5 years old. I have taught him personally how to destroy anybody in physical contact OR even to kill a fully grown up adult. But I have told him never ever to attack anybody,  So may be this is why he is getting bullied. This bullying will stop tomorrow within one hour of school opening—I will do it my way. All I am asking you  is to turn a Nelsons eye.  Though my 12 year old son is 5 feet 9 inches tall and 85 kilos in weight , the bully will NOT be hurt, he will only be humiliated ”.

I made a hefty donation to the principal’s school fund and we left.

On the way back my wife asked me “ Are you going to tell Aashik to beat up the bully. He can do it very easily, but then what if the bully relatiates by poking his eye with a compass needle ? “

I said “ I would rather have a one eyed son , than a coward with my blood running in his veins . This bully works safe in the assumption that there will be NO relatiation .  At his age of 16, he wants to impress all the 13 year old girls , by taking on a bigger child.   He suffers from resentment as his parents have left him alone and are in Dubai" . 
" Bullying gives him release from his frustrations.  This is a easy way out to displace internal aggression .  It makes him feel empowered.   Teasing, playing practical jokes, throwing things at you,  hiding personal belongings,  is all part of the bully’s tactics .  The only way out is to take him head on , just once , without hurting him physically “

So after I reached home I told my son  “ Tomorrow as soon as you go to school, the bully will start off as usual.  He is just trying to be a hero in front of the girls by taking on a guy double his size. I want you to do this  – now watch carefully.  If you don’t do exactly what I tell you, when you come home in the evening I will kick your fuckin' ass. “

My son cried bitterly , for I was his ultimate hero, and had never beaten him or spoke to him rudely till then.

Next day—he went to school .

The bully came to him with his usual teasing games with the whole class watching. 

My son bent him double, picked him off the ground whirled him around to upset his inner ear cochlea balance, and threw him 8 feet away. He lay there for a couple of minutes  totally dazed , picked himself up and came charging . This time my son palmed his jaw, jerked his head backwards to upset the inner ear spirit level again, and shoved him so hard that he went flying again . It took some time for him regain his balance get up and slink away .

That was it.

The girls , two dozen of them were the first to start clapping , and then the rest of the class followed .

This was what all of them wanted. Before he left school for the day , this 16 year old bully taunted my son  “ Next time you mother asks me for notes ,  I wont give it to her!”

The word spread  all over school like wild fire – Aashik has beaten up the school bully.  This came to my wife from several sources. Few parents thanked my wife as the previous year 3 childern left the school, unable to face this type of harassment. Complaining to the teachers made NO difference as the bully's parents were wealthy people from Dubai, and close to a school board member.

Six days later, a Karate black belt was to come and demonstrate his prowess in breaking tiles, to get more enrollment into the Karate club of school .

I told my son “ After this man finishes, I want you to go on stage and ask for one more tile and break it front of the whole school  .  I don’t care if you break your bone —  make sure you do it “

His sweet spot was hard like steel — having pounded it on the hard sand bag a thousands of times over the years. The sweet spot bone micro fractures and gets mended several times over , and thus gets tough.

This art is something I had taught my son very early in life –to use the sweet spot 2 inches off the elbow ( toward the palm ) and smash the brick stack with lightning speed , arm back swing like a nanchaku, and using FULL body weight for follow through.



Only fools break bricks with a wrist chop, as there are too many bones and cartilages at the tender wrist. A punch or chop can never be hard enough.

The next day my wife’s friend call up and says . “ Do you know that Aaskik has become famous in school by out smashing the black belt Karate instructor? ”

So in the evening my son comes back with the look of a cat who swallowed all the cream .

I asked him what was the reaction of the all students and teachers.  He imitated them .  There was a collective amazed involuntary gasp  from hundreds of throats.


Goodbye bullies— forever !


When I was a small boy I used to be the “ official bully basher” .

Children at school who were bullied used to come and complain to me and I would take on the bullies who were twice my size. 

I would kick the living shit out of them, including the principal’s son who was a bully. Almost every week I would come home with my uniform shirt torn.  I broke my nose thrice.

So, imagine my distress to see both my sons so peace loving— and they don’t like to fight for a cause .

You don’t need to be physically tough like my son.

You just need to show guts, or fierce intent, or strength , or project unquantified danger – it is about making their balls ascend to their throats -- instant " Kundalini climb" style.


Let me give an example of a “show of strength”  –

12 years ago we shifted to our new home . There was a nukkad where the poor unemployed youth used to spend their time gossiping or ogling at the girls passing by.  From their base all could see my bungalow gates.  So I took my 4 feet long sword, from the usual hiding place inside the almirah.

As soon as I started walking to the gates my wife came running. “What, are you up to? You want the show off your sword to those nukkad boys or what? “

 I said  “ NO, I am just taking insurance. Very soon I will be leaving home to join the ship, and you will be home alone with a 5 year old child , with NO neighbours around shouting distance”

So, I took my evil looking and extremely sharp sword outside the gates and pretended to cut off a few imaginary creepers and shrubs, all the time knowing a dozen pairs of eyes are watching every inch of my progress .

After I came back home for my stint on ship, my wife told me .  Every house on the street lost their expensive gate lamps except our house on one dark rainy night.

What everybody is discussing is why only our house was spared.  And then she says herself—I think it was the “sword effect”.

She is right. 

Now let me talk about  “UNquantified danger” --

 Every time we went for a holiday  I took my cold steel serrated dagger ( set me back by 400 US dollars ) along strapped to my waist.  

My idea of a holiday was fast flowing clear water through rocks. Just lie down , get a free flowing water massage, relax in total privacy, with your family  —

Every time my elder son used to ask me “ Daddy why do you take that dagger with you? “

I  used to reply “ One day , you will see me using it.  Till  then patience , son !”

So while on holiday somewhere at the Karnataka border, I stopped the car to buy some cold Coke and chocolates.  On the wall opposite the street , some youngsters were sitting –about 8 of them . As soon as they saw me and my spaced out beard , my wife and niece —they started making funny noises and yodeling catcalls.

So I told my elder son “ Now the time has come to show you what magic this dagger can do.  I will raise my arms when I am out of this store and pretend to yawn with my hands high in the air. At that time this dagger will pop out from underneath my hiked up T shirt.  Just watch , soak it in, and let me know later what you saw “

Later after we drove off , my son totally excited cried  “ Daddy, you should have seen their faces, when they suddenly saw your knife.  They all became silent and were sitting like stones “

I said “ Well, none of them bargained for the fact that they could lose their lives on that very wall, on which they were all so merry a few minutes ago  !”

Let me give another example of “showing grave intent”.

7 months ago, my elder son had just come home from Cornell during his end of semester Christmas 2010  vacation.  Myself , my wife and two children aged 23 and 16 went for a movie at a theatre in Calicut showing a 3D movie .

The theatre was full .  There were 5 rowdie youngsters at the back row of the balcony making loud sounds, whistling , passing loud uncouth remarks , even breaking their chairs —we could hear the cracking sounds.

Immediately my wife held on to my arm, and said “ You are NOT gonna confront them . They are just having a ball, in a group. I am telling you. Meri kasam! ”

She held on to my arm so strong that that spot took 2 weeks to recover from compressed nerves and damaged muscle fibres.

At half time interval,  as soon as I saw this gang going out for a smoke, I made an excuse that I have to go and take a leak.  And then I doubled back to the spot where these trouble makers were sitting in a group , smoking and generally having a ball. They had their tails up, as all were giving them a wide berth.

So I went to them and said “ After the interval , when the movie starts,  I don’t want to hear you guys at all --  If I hear you breathe , just see what I do to you.  By the way, I am NOT police — I sit in the front row with my wife and two sons  “

When I came back to my seat my wife and two sons asked me “ We know you talked to those men .What did you tell them?”

I told the truth “ I told them that I don’t want to hear them breathe. I did NOT tell them what I will do to them if they disobey— that is their problem to figure it out  .  Bullies always work on the preconceived notion that there will NOT be a severe price to pay. It is this feeling of safety which propels them “

20 minutes after the movie started again, the group of 5 quietly melted away in the darkness.

Later my elder genius son , who was never a fan of my tough acting , “taking on the world alone ”  tactics , told his mother in private  at the airport  ” There was only one man in that  movie hall holding hundreds , who could have silenced that rowdy gang,  and he did it! ”

Now let me talk about "bullying at the workplace "--

Before going to Cornell for his ME in computer science, he worked for the biggest computer software company in India for 6 months-- just to get work experience, till he left India.

He stayed with a brilliant Bihari boy , together in a rented flat. 

So one day my son called me up and asked me if I have some tips for painful stomach ulcers. He said his flatmate, suffers from it. 

So i wanted to know what type of food he eats. My son said he has rarely eaten with him , that he goes to office by 7 AM and comes back at midnight, no Saturdays and Sundays .

I had a piece of advise--  I told my son never to get USED.  

He replied that he goes to office at 9AM and comes back by 6 PM-- but the Bihari friend , was being used by his female boss. 

She would constantly shout at him , she would work only between 9 to 5 will NOT come on Saturdays / Sundays . And that all the projects were powered by the fertile brains of his friend -- but she took all the credit personally , as trainees don't count.

I said " Tell your friend , that I told him this.  Never ever get used.  And this type of thing is NOT gonna help his ulcers. He MUST confront this Cruella De Ville."

Next day my excited son calls me up on the ship . 

He said " His friend confronted her .  He told her that he would report to her boss, that she does NOT have any brains , has NO dang clue what is happening , that she cannot understand the big picture or small picture of current ongoing high profile project with a major US software company, that she is just a parasite / middleman in the work place, but yet hogging all the team effort credit ,  

-- that she has climbed this far up the ladder this slimy way--  

but no more !".

Wonder of wonders--  that very hour she applied for 6 months of official long leave and left the office. 

I guess she knew what she was worth. The only way this pretender female boss could continue was by twisting the arm of her team, by harassing, shouting, threatening --

It is your fault if you allow such a thing to happen to you in your workplace. 

You are entitled to say NO to such mindless abuse. 








1.                  Description:
Love this post. I remember going to engineering college in Kerala and the first year, all the guys would come and harass and rag the girls.
Now I was especially targetted because I mixed (malyali and north indian) spoke little to no malayalam and was 17 and pretty.
The girls would look to the ground and walk away while they were teased, not me I always looked up.
A gang of particularly rowdy guys once were waiting for me outside class and as we left, they stopped me ,I looked up and said in English, I don't speak Malayalam, but move out of my way or you wont have any teeth left. They moved.
I walked away. Nobody harassed me after that. That was 20 years ago. The bullies know what they are doing is wrong, but in kerala especially women don't speak up.
2.                  Description:
Beautiful post Sir! There are some people who take pleasure in other people's misery, that definitely gets on my nerves.

I had a friend in 12th grade who was constantly picked on every day, the bullies used to slap him and taunt him when ever they passed him by.

So i started sitting with him in the class, and became his wall. I never let the bullies touch him.

I never been in a fight in my life till then, and never been trained for a fight.

I was one day playing football in recess and the bully joined the other team, intentionally. ( His target had shifted from my friend to me)

He kicked my foot as i was dribbling the ball, so i kicked the ball right into his face - he hurt his nose.

Later he tried to push me down when my back was turned, but i did not fall and i was able to keep my balance - may be from all the adrenaline from playing football.

Then i chased him half the way through the foot ball field and threw him to the ground, i did not realize i was growling. I wanted to beat him up badly but when i saw the terrified faces of people around me - i stopped.

I suppose that was it, i let him go.

The bullying stopped as time passed.
3.                  Description:

The question i asked my self after watching this movie above, can we take on this ultimate bully?

I surely hope so!

I know for sure that "independence" of India was a fake, and an attempt to transform their direct strategy of slavery was transformed into " Sustainable Exploitation". A term the Rothschilds came up with to control the world forever, using "Exclusive religion" and the rest of the system at their disposal.
1.                        Description:
Hey Druv,

I agree with you. India or for that matter Pakistan never got any independence. In my childhood I used to wonder what Mr Mountbatten was doing in India after British left. But now after many years of accumulated knowledge, I realize that he was here for a reason.
See how Manmohan Singh and his team has diverted attention of the public from the FDI relaxation by killing an innocent girl who was raped by some hooligans.

Best Regards,
4.                  Description:
Good One :) Aashik is a sweetheart.
5.                  Description:
It’s true; it’s not about muscle or power but the willingness to face it no matter what the outcome is. Would rather be beaten up to death trying than give up and be submissive.
6.                  Description:
hi anurag,

i agree with hitler when he told netaji bose " what type of people are you-- millions of indians cant drive away a few englishmen? "

even if 2% indians had picked up stones like the palestinians , we could have killed them like mad dogs on the street!.

capt ajit vadakayil
7.                  Description:
Wow! What a post sir! Three cheers!
8.                  Description:
Very Inspiring.
9.                  Description:
Hi Captain
I totally agree with you, see how Pakistan is trying to bullying us everyday,and now even bangladesh is trying the same with frequent trespassing at the borders, this all is happening b/c of the spineless politicians who are merely puppets, who in front of Pak foreign minister start thinking with their testis (Yes, Brain too has two small anatomical str. called Testis- if I still remember my anatomy classes).
The moment we can show aggression our bullies will gently fold their tail between legs like a cat
10.              Description:
Dear Captain

Words are not enough to express thanks to you for such an inspiring and interesting post.

Despite all your posts being excellent, if reluctantly I have to choose your best posts, this particular shall remain as one of your top 3 posts - in my personal opinion.

Sometimes, people close to us misunderstand our self-confidence and self-respect. Courage is a quality that I feel doesn't necessarily conform to logic and the one who is courageous enough to swim against the tide is often ostracized for 'rocking the boat'/ disturbing the status quo.
I have a personal experience of having been labelled 'arrogant'/'selfish/'egoistic' in a situation, wherein, my decision- I had deemed as a courageous move - but 'the others' felt that it was impractical. As the decision would have affected my near n dear ones, I had no way out but to abandon my decision and suffer for almost 2 years in an unsatisfactory situation. It has taken me quite some time to regain my self-confidence, gradually though. Having read your post, I am sure not to let my guard down in future.

Thank you for the BOOST with this brilliant piece of inspiration Capt.

With regards - RI
11.              Description:
Namaste Captain,
Though my 12 year old son is 5 feet 9 inches tall and 85 kilos in weight...
after reading this i really want to know from you what are your ways to do that?
i really want to increase my height, i tried many ways but of no use, my parents are taller..please i need your help on height is 5.5 and age is 21

1.                        Description:
hi rs,

after age 21-- you cannot expect to grow further.

there are people who will promise you and milk you off your money.

capt ajit vadakayil
2.                        Description:
thank you for the fastest reply Captain...
still can you tell any of your way to increase height..
your son really have followed your tactics to reach 5.9 at just 12.
so if possible share some of exercise or else i wud rather say any of your secret to increase height?
atleast my son shud not say that because of my dad i am short...

3.                        Description:
positively Waiting for your reply Captain...
4.                        Description:
hi rs,

if a 21 year old man hangs by his knees upside down-- regularly-- his spine can be stretched.

the spine elongates.

you height as soon as you get up from bed is 1.4 cms MORE than when you are about to sleep at night.

capt ajit vadakayil
5.                        Description:
Thank you captain...
I wll definately try this..
Also followng your SuryaNamskar post..
Wll post the effect after few months
I am even taking help of Homeopathy for this as my relative is doctor (so free medicines ;) ...
In future if you got any secret medication or exercise for this. Then plz let us know...

Thank you so much Captain...
12.              Description:
hi sh,

there is a difference between light headedness and vertigo.

in lightheadedness you may feel dizzy, but your surroundings do NOT move. lightheadedness often goes away or improves when you lie down. lightheadedness is often a momentary drop in blood pressure when you get up too fast from your seat , and blood flow to your head suddenly becomes less .

vertigo is a feeling that you or your surroundings are moving when there is no actual movement. you may feel as though you are spinning, whirling, falling, or tilting. when you have severe vertigo, you may feel very nauseated . You will have trouble walking or standing, and you may lose your balance and fall.

vertigo occurs when there is conflict between the signals sent to the brain by various balance- and position-sensing systems of the body.

a portion of the inner ear cochlea is a spirit level that detect motion and changes in position.
injury to or diseases of the inner ear can send false signals to the brain indicating that the balance mechanism of the inner ear (labyrinth) detects motion. if these false signals conflict with signals from the other balance and positioning centers of the body, vertigo may occur.

vision gives you information about your position and motion in relationship to the rest of the world--and this is one area of conflict with the inner ear spirit level.

If you have vertigo, do not lie flat on your back. prop yourself up slightly to relieve the spinning sensation.

there are crystals of calcium carbonate within inner ear fluid that pull on sensory hair cells during movement and so stimulate the vestibular nerve to send positional information to the brain.

symptoms can accompany vertigo, including hearing loss, tinnitus, nausea, vomiting or a feeling of fullness in the ear.

positional vertigo is a type of dizziness that occurs when a person rolls in bed, bends over, or looks up. it is caused by crystals in the inner ear that are out of their normal position, and is easily resolved in most cases by a simple roll procedure.

watch the youtube video below- Epley for Dizziness

drink plenty of fluids--have coriander in the curry. sambhar is full of it.

do not try to read when symptoms occur. avoid bright lights.

feeling seasick at sea, is a problem resulting from a miscommunication between a healthy visual system and a healthy inner ear system.

in this circumstance, the ears are telling the brain that there is movement, while the eyes may be seeing the fixed surroundings of the cabin. the inner ear cochlea is filled with liquid. microscopic hairs called cilia project out into this liquid and they release a chemical neurotransmitter when stimulated

changes in visual acuity, glaucoma, and cataracts are examples of visual problems that in some individuals may be enough to give them a balance disorder.

when walking, focus on distant objects. when riding in a car, try to sit in the front seat. Look out the window at a fixed point. when going around curves, look at a distant object beyond the curve.

use a walking stick for reassurance-- .and touch (tactile) orientation.

avoid activities that move the head up and down repetitively. try to avoid keeping the head tilted back for long periods of time, for example dusting above your head.

consult your doctor for medication.

to be frank-- yesterday i gave my gym coach ( who keeps following me like a poodle to gain some knowledge ) the INNER EAR vertigo KALARI tretment. doubled him over, picked him clean off the ground, whirled him around thrice and just deposited him on the floor.

so today just two hour back he was narrating to me ( with a sheepish grin ) that after 3 hours when he took the bus ride back home from the gym , he could NOT stand up as he felt the whole bus going round and round.

capt ajit vadakayil
13.              Description:
can you give us some advice on how to handle rogue room-mates in our hostel rooms??Most of the time they carry weapons like blades or screw-drivers with 'em.Please give us some tips...
1.                        Description:
hi 766,

one of my colleagues's 18 year old daugher ( she had HUGE tits ) used to be teased daily in a vulga sexual manner by some goondas and a north indian city-- and he was planning to move out to another neighbourhood.

so i gave him some advise.

he went home early on leave-- one day he accompanied his daugher to college, and the goondas teased even more -- about her getting her father as a body guard .

on the way back --he received a call on his mobile phone--just in front of the goondas-- and he opened his brief case , and out fell a HUGE MEAT CHOPPER on the street.

the next day onwards -- these road side romeo goondas left his daugher alone.



capt ajit vadakayil
14.              Description:
I agree Sir.And since you have so much experience about how this world really functions,I consider you my Guru,and I believe I can consult you with any matters that bother me...
But Sir,there are some who say honourable fighting has NO place in today's society,and thus justifying their actions they will turn to any SICK and DISGUSTING means necessary to win!!!!
What should one do in such situations,Sir??
Your loyal follower and student,
1.                        Description:
hi 766,

vishnu avatar rama was TOO honourable .

that is why he incarnated a krishna -- to be practical-- to get the job done.

capt ajit vadakayil
15.              Description:
Thanks for your comments,Sir!
Btw,In Kalari Payattu there is something called choondu marmam, which is used to attack the opponent with spiritual power. Is it real?
1.                        Description:
hi 766,


punch into google search-

i have put a video of a westerner doing it.-- NO TOUCH KNOCK DOWN.

capt ajit vadakayil

16.              Description:*
hi n,



Malcolm X had exposed martin luther king jr-- by R media blacked him out . On February 21, 1965, Malcolm X was assassinated.

Martin Luther King, Jr.'s telegram to Betty Shabazz expressed his sadness at "the shocking and tragic assassination of your husband."

While we did not always see eye to eye on methods to solve the race problem, I always had a deep affection for Malcolm and felt that he had a great ability to put his finger on the existence and root of the problem"

In the 1970s, the public learned about COINTELPRO and other secret FBI programs established to infiltrate and disrupt BLACK civil rights organizations during the 1950s and 1960s.

In the late 1960s, increasingly radical black activists based their movements largely on Malcolm X and his teachings.

The grandson of Malcolm X was beaten to death last year.

The Associated Press last year that the pair had been lured to the bar by a young woman who spoke to them in English. He said they were later presented with the exorbitant bill of 1200 USD, that included not only drinks but also music and female companionship.

This is nothing-- myself , my canadian chief engineer and my technical shore boss was presented with a bill of 5500 EUROS , at a European bar , just 5 hours before the ship's delivery ceremony at 3 AM .

i took over the situation-- and beat the bouncers ( 3 man mountains of 200 kilos each ) by BRAIN ATTACK which confused them poor guys . The thing is NOT to show fear.

one thing you can be sure is -- god gain either brains or brawn to man-- NOT both.

Punch into Google search-

Martin Luther King was also brain washed by Tolstoy’s NON VIOLENCE and AHIMSA stuff . Allow the superior whites to shit on your face every hour of the day, till you die .

And if you feel frustrated spin the fu#kin’ charka a bit more faster .

Like Modi said—we Indians got our freedom by spinning charka , while praising fellow Gujju brother Gandhi .

capt ajit vadakayil
17.              Description:
Hi Capt. hope you're good. Interesting you say this topic of "Bully." Any advice for BPO sector especially 4 ladies w.r.t favours, couch and harassment inside office?
18.              Description:
Dear Capt,
Thanks a lot after reading your blog on bully I faced the bullies who harassed me many times in college . I looked at their eyes & said I don't like it u better stop it or face severe consequences(in front of every1) . I cannot believe but they literally felt helpless & said sorry to me in front of every1.
Thanks Capt :)